How to Pray for a Spouse

As you can see from the title of this article, I want to share with you if you are single right now. 

Perhaps you are widowed or divorced and looking for another partner. Or maybe you are single and wanting the right person to fill a gap in your life. No matter what you are desiring, the Lord has someone special for you.

Perhaps right now you feel frustrated and think that it won’t happen. Or maybe you just can’t seem to find the right person. 

If this is what you are experiencing don’t be despondent. I want to share with you from my own experiences how to get a partner who will meet your every need and desire. When this happens, you will rejoice at what the Lord has done and how good He has been to you.

I really believe that the Lord wants to give each person a partner. He will give you someone who will complement and fill the gaps where things are lacking in the other person.

In the Garden of Eden after the Lord had created Adam, He said to him,

It is not good that man should be alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him.

The Lord made man in such a way that he would only be complete with a partner at his side. Unless the Lord has specifically called you to be on your own so you can minister more effectively for Him, I believe that each person can find a partner and become one with them.

Before I begin, I want to point out that I’m going to be writing from the point of view of a woman finding a husband, so I will continually talk about him. Nevertheless, the principles are exactly the same for a man looking for a wife.

Here then are some of the things that I want to share.

Be Specific

I wrote an article previously entitled Bulldozing Through Prayer Problems. In this article I mention about being specific about your desires. It is important no matter what you want from the Lord. But it is essential when you are looking for a life’s partner.

This should be your starting point. Maybe you have been praying something like this.

“Lord, I need a partner. Please give me one.”

The Lord will say, “Sure.” But there will be very little for the angels to work with to bring your desire to you.

The one thing I have learned about the Lord over the years is that He will never impose His will on you. You have to give Him the authority to work on your behalf. The angels also need to know exactly what you want so they can bring it to pass.

He can still bring you a husband if you pray like that. But He desires so much to bless you, and it pleases Him to give you the very best according to your desires. In James Chapter 1 it says that God gives us every good and every perfect gift. I believe we can stand on this promise for a partner.

I have been married twice. Both times I met my husbands I did what I’m going to share with you now, and each time the Lord honored my requests in a wonderful way.

The first thing to do is to sit down with a pen and paper or open a document on the computer. Then think about exactly what you’re looking for in a partner.

Spiritual Comes First

The spiritual qualities are the most important. This is especially if you are looking for a Christian and want to work for the Lord. Tell Him what you would like him to be like.

Maybe you would like someone who is already in the ministry so you can minister with him. Or maybe you have a burden to work with young people. If so then you could ask for someone who is already involved in that type of work so that you can flow with him and complement him.

Mental or Emotional Aspects

Mental or emotional aspects come next.

What do you want him to be like? Do you want him to be strong and macho, or loving and gentle? Do you want him to be a strong leader? Then you can include general desires about what he must be like.

Maybe you want someone who likes skiing so you can enjoy the snow together. Or if you enjoy outdoor life you can ask for someone who likes doing the same thing.

Express your desires in the negative sense too. For example, if you absolutely loathe sports, it won’t be a good idea if your husband is a sports coach and is constantly at baseball games.

If you do not want something, then make a note of it on the list as well. Remember, you’re beginning to form a picture of what you want. And when you have a clear picture in your mind then your faith can begin to form in a much better and quicker way.

The Desired Look

Physical aspects come last, but they are nevertheless important. Must your husband be tall or short, blond or dark-haired? What color must his eyes be? 

Maybe you want someone who is slim and trim. Or perhaps you want a well-built, strong, muscular person who likes working out and being fit. Just write it down as you think of it, and begin to visualize him in your mind.

To me the physical side wasn’t a major factor. My present husband Les is a bit shorter than what I was used to, but it wasn’t a big problem for me. 

I knew he was the right person and a few inches height difference didn’t matter. I wasn’t going to reject him just for this reason.

It all depends on you. You have to make the choice as to whether you accept or reject who you meet. The Lord will never force anyone on you.

Speak and Review

When you have written all of these things down, take the paper, hold it up to the Lord and read it out loud. Say something like this.

“Lord, I’m asking you for a husband, and these are the things that I desire in him.” 

Read out the list now. Put it up on a wall or place where you will continually see it. Sometimes the fridge door is a good place, next to your computer or in the bathroom.

Read your list out loud daily, preferably morning and night, and thank the Lord that He has heard you and given you your heart’s desire. To make it more powerful, you can add some Scripture promises to it like this. 

Whatsoever things you desire, when you pray believe that you receive them and you shall have them.

Quote that Scripture, then read out your list and say,

“In the name of Jesus I thank you Lord that I have received my husband from you. He is like this.” 

Then read again the list you have made up.

Remember to visualize him as you speak out your list. Let’s face it, if the Lord brings someone your way and you don’t have a mental picture in your mind of who you want, how will you know if he is the right person or not?

As you continue to do this you may not feel anything building up inside of you. At times you may feel that you aren’t likely to meet anyone because your circumstances seem to be pointing that way.

But don’t give up. One day suddenly you will know without a shadow of a doubt that you have your desire. It is kind of like a cork suddenly popping off a bottle. You just know you have him.

The angels are working continually, and the Lord is directing things that you cannot see to bring about this desire. You just have to trust Him because He is working on your behalf.

When you reach that point of knowing, it is no longer necessary to confess your list unless you want to review it just for yourself. You should now have a pretty good picture of what you want in your partner. Now all you have to do is thank the Lord and wait for His perfect timing to meet.

Sometimes it can take a long time depending on what you’re asking for and how fussy you are. When my step-daughter prayed for her husband, it took three years before her desire manifested, and we had to move overseas in order for it to happen.

I’m not saying this is what will take place with you. But the Lord could make a way for you to move your location or job in order to fulfill your desire. You just need to be open to His leading.

That wraps up how to go about praying for your future spouse. In the Praying for a Spouse – Daphne’s Story and Les’s story we will share our versions of how we met.

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