Transforming Hurts to Healing
Let me start this article with a question. How many times has someone done or said something hurtful to you, and you feel like escaping like Elijah did? You want to escape into a little hole and forget about the world and its pressures.
I’m sure you know what I am talking about. And I do understand your pain, because I have been there many times myself. At one time I began to wonder if I was destined to have it for the rest of my life.
If you feel the same way, unfortunately the answer is yes. Jesus said we would have tribulation in this world. But the good news is you don’t have to let it sink you. There is an easy, powerful way to overcome it.
Perhaps you are facing something like this right now. If so, I want to share with you a few ways to turn the negative feelings around fast so that you get the victory in your life.
Step 1: Start With Forgiveness
The first and most important thing to do is to forgive the offender. I know this is really hard to do, but this will start off the process of getting victory.
When Jesus walked on this earth and He taught us the Lord’s Prayer He said,
Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.
Forgiving others and asking for our own forgiveness go hand in hand and are both very important. You see forgiving others helps to keep your relationship with them clear. And asking for forgiveness for your own sins keeps your relationship with the Lord clear.
When I was younger I suffered very badly when people rejected me. I battled so much to forgive people who hurt me. I felt bruised and battered for days and thought it would never heal.
Then the Lord revealed something to me. He showed me that He suffered the ultimate hurt from people. He was sinless, but yet He paid the price for the sins of the whole world.
He would have been quite justified to be furious with them. But instead He just kept quiet like a lamb and spoke forgiveness to them.
When I realized this, I began to see that our hurts and injustices are pretty puny compared to what the Lord faced and overcame by forgiving them. This really helped me to be able to do it myself.
Could anything that was done to me be as bad as having the sins of the whole world loaded unfairly on me? Also, He came to show us how to live, what to do, and what our attitude should be. I saw that I needed to follow His leading.
Once you have made that choice to forgive, do so out loud. It helps to set you free. Also Satan can’t come and plague you with negative feelings anymore, because he has heard it for himself.
Words spoken out loud are very important because they carry power with them. Simply thinking about it is no good. You must speak it into the earth and say something like,
“Lord, I forgive (so and so) for upsetting me today. She’s got so many problems and I guess she’s just spewing, so I put it to sleep now.”
Next you need to ask the Lord to forgive you for any negative feelings or emotions. If you’re bitter or angry say to the Lord,
“Lord, please forgive me for reacting like I did. I give it to you and ask you to wash me clean now.”
The Lord will remove it instantly and restore the relationship with you.
Step 2: Resist Satan
Next you need to tell Satan to take his hands off you. Even if you reacted negatively and asked the Lord to wash you clean, Satan will often come and accuse you of failing.
He will try and bring the whole ugly situation up again. He’s the accuser of the brethren, and he tries to make you feel so awful because of what has happened, that you don’t want to even raise your head.
Watch out for this because it is one of his ace cards. When you identify it, resist him and tell him to go, because he has no right to do that. You are forgiven and your sins are forgotten.
Step 3: Receive Your Healing
So you have spoken forgiveness and restored the relationships with the offender and the Lord. Now He will move in and remove the hurt that you are feeling.
He will do it quickly when you ask Him to do so. He will reach deep inside you and pour His healing balm on you. You may suddenly find the pain gone, and any feelings of anger or resentment will simply fizzle out.
Here is another question to think about. Do you find that you always have a battle getting victory over anyone who hurts you?
If you find the pattern repeating itself, it could be that you were hurt before you were even born, during your early years, or in adolescence.
These are the times when all hurts take place and they leave a mark on your character. Each time a similar situation presents itself in later life, you feel the same hurt even as an adult. Then you start to think you’re crazy, because you can’t get a handle on it.
This is a vast subject and I cannot cover it here. But if you are aware of something that could be an early hurt surfacing, it is a good idea to pray about it.
You can pray about it yourself. But if you are not getting the victory, you may need someone to pray with you.
It should be someone who can hear the voice of the Lord, and can let Him show them where the problem originated from. Then when the first hurtful event is exposed, you can ask the Lord to remove it and take away the painful sting that goes with it. This is what inner healing is all about.
Step 4: The Power of Blessing
Once you have taken care of the healing aspect, here are some other things you can do to get victory.
When God first called Abraham away from his home, He told him He would produce a great nation from him. God said in Genesis 12:3,
I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will curse;
This is a powerful Scripture. If you speak blessing on others, especially those who hurt you, you release the Lord’s power on them for change. It also comes back to you too. So, the more you bless others, the more you will be blessed yourself.
Romans 12:14 says this.
Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
Blessing people must be important if Paul repeats it twice. If only people realized what a powerful, positive influence you can be in the lives of others.
I have made it a habit to speak blessing on people all the time, no matter where I am. I may be in a queue to pay for groceries or waiting to catch a bus.
No matter where you find yourself, give the same thing a try. Just mutter softly under your breath and speak blessing. Here is an example. If I say see a pregnant woman I say,
“Lord, I bless this lady and her baby. Let her pregnancy go smoothly and may the baby come to know you.”
Maybe I see an old man and I say,
“Lord, I bless this gentleman. Thank you for meeting all his needs now.”
You will be amazed at how your spirit begins to soar when you do this. It is because you’re giving out to others in love, and you’re taking your eyes off yourself and your own needs and problems.
When Les and I first began doing this, we suddenly became aware of people smiling at us or doing little things to bless us. They were total strangers to us too.
Then the Lord reminded me that we had been sowing and therefore we were also reaping. So if someone has hurt you, release the Lord’s power into their lives by speaking blessing on them and get a blessing in return.
You can also not only speak blessing on them, but do things to be a blessing. Jesus said that when you give food or drink to your enemy you are heaping coals of fire on their head.
Someone may have been deliberately nasty to you. But instead of yelling or spewing at them, do something that is a blessing to them instead.
Here’s an example. Perhaps you and your spouse had an argument in the evening before going to bed. Why not now heap coals of fire on his or her head by taking them breakfast in bed the next morning?
You may think this is a bit overdone. But even little acts of kindness to someone who is troubling you can do wonders to ease stress and restore relationships.
So there you have some valuable steps to turn problems and hurtful situations around. If you keep using them they will become easier to do. Then your life will go from defeat and failure to victory and blessing.